Sharing recipes, crafts and frugal living, the challenges and triumphs of parenting a neurotypical child and a child on the Autism Spectrum. Yoga Instructor said goodbye to her nightly glass of Chardonnay to give up habits that were not serving her purpose in life! The CocktailMom name remains, however with a new focus on healthy and authentic living.

1/05/2010

Back to School...


Yesterday was Logan's first day back to school from winter break. I made sure to wake up extra early so I wouldn't feel rushed which then makes the kids feel rushed as I chant, "come on..shoes on..jackets on...let's go!...let's go!" I was expecting Logan to have a breakdown, refuse to go to school, walk dragging his feet up the hill while crying. These transitions from school breaks are normally the worst. But none of that happened yesterday.

Yesterday the morning went along smoothly, keeping to our school day routine as if winter break never even happened. To say I was shocked is an understatement.

We get to school and I stand at the top of the hallway, Logan still refuses to be dropped off with the rest of the kids in the front of the building, which is OK by me I enjoy having that last moment together just as much as he does. We have a routine even there that we do everyday. Memorized lines we say to one another. It makes him feel "safe" he tells me. We stop at the mural and I kneel down for a hug and kiss. I then use that moment to remind him of something in his backpack that he needs to give his teacher, practice his clues one more time for his Friday mystery bag item etc, etc.
I then tell him "have a great day sweetie", he then replies "OK take care of Dharma and Zane for me."
"Okay I will", I respond.
He turns and walks down the hall, waving his left hand goodbye but not looking at me... as he does every school day.

And then he turns around, tears in his eyes and runs back to me on the verge of completely breaking down.
"You didn't say it Mommy!!! You didn't say it!!"
I'm scanning my lines in my head as if I'm on center stage and the spotlight is on me and everyone is waiting for me to deliver my line....

"You're going to be great!"

A huge smile spreads across his face.
A deep sigh of relief.
He turns to leave again.
I call out, "you're going to be great Logan! You always will be."
"I know, Mom. Thanks!"

You're going to be great.
Don't you wish someone told you that everyday as you were about to embark on your day. I'm not a huge resolution maker but this year I'm going to promise to show that compassion to myself . Let's do it together.

You're going to be great!!
Happy New Year!

8 comments:

annasoc said...

Gretchen,
That is a beautiful thought. I should tape it to my mirror in the morning. All of us need it as much as Logan.
Hope to see you Thursday.

Raven said...

Awe Gretch, stop making me cry!
You're the greatest.
Love you.

morninglight mama said...

I am regularly awed by your parenting and Logan posts. This is just wonderful, and you are both so lucky to have each other!

MommyNaniBooboo said...

Just when I'm feeling all comfy in my "I hate life boots" and "people suck" T-shirt, you have to go and post this.
Crap- now I'm all inspired and stuff...

Madmother said...

Another teary one here. I live a very similar life with a very similar, albeit older, boy.

We spent last night in sad tears watching Edward Scissorhands. It never entered my sleep-deprived adled brain that he would relate so closely to himself the innocence and misunderstanding of Edward. So heartbreaking to watch.

Anonymous said...

It really takes Logan to show us the way and to remind us, That WE are GREAT! Thanks Gretchen.

giastates said...

A beautiful moment and reminder of how powerful our words and love are....thank you for sharing. Love to you...

Nancy said...

This is a wonderful post Gretchen. Thank you for sharing it. I'm a 'lurker' on your blog but figured I'd finally tell you how much I appreciate it. Hi to all!

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